Thursday, July 30, 2009

Clea’s body seemed to be more fluid than the water itself.

Hey, UK! I'm in the new (August) issue of Scarlet, with an erotic lesbian love story called "In Her Element." The setting is a swimming pool.


It was as if she were being fucked—and made love to—not only by her woman, but also by the water—her woman’s element, the substance at Clea’s command.

Thanks, Scarlet!

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More info! Thanks to the wonderful Janine, I've learned that Emily Dubberley, Charlotte Stein, and Janine "Saw It First" Ashbless herself are also in this issue! And JA points out that the mag can be purchased as a download, as an alternative to print.

Monday, July 27, 2009

How the Crab Got Its Knees, part 2

The munificent M. Christian has now posted part 2 of my vintage Kipling–Kama Sutra mashup, "Karkataka, or How the Crab Got Its Knees." You'll find it at M.C.'s Frequently Felt blog. (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, start here.)

Sunday, July 26, 2009

A Woman for All Seasons

That's our Isabel Kerr ... and she's proving it once again, this time with a multi-sense-stimulating celebration of ginger!

It's all part of the Spicy Summer Sunday blog tour.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Character-izing

A couple of months ago, I was introduced (via the brilliant Donna George Storey) to a fabulous online publication called Black Heart Magazine.

Today, a new piece of mine, "In Character," appears at Black Heart as the latest installment of their "Friction Fridays" erotica series. In this story, we see that sometimes the show must go on even after the show is over.

Thank you, Black Heart!

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Welcome to Pickledilly Circus

For years, I was a total dickweed when it came to dill weed. I’ve always loved pickles (speaking of which ... are you gonna eat yours? otherwise, please pass it over); but I didn’t properly appreciate that the dill in “dill pickle” meant, well, DILL. What a picklehead!

I believe my first introduction to dill as a spotlighted ingredient was in a dish prepared, as my mother so aptly described it, “with dill and capers.” This moment also represented my formal introduction to capers. Thus, for many years, the pair were linked as inextricably in my mind as Simon and Garfunkel.

The thing is, I don’t really care for capers. Or caper flicks, for that matter. Except After the Fox. Oh, and Hot Millions—that’s a good one. I love the part [*SPOILER*] where Peter Ustinov accidentally sets off the alarm, then slyly pretends his break-in was part of a security test that he’d alerted Karl Malden and Bob Newhart to in advance, via a memo that has “mysteriously disappeared.” I was thinking about that scene the other day, when I heard news of Malden’s death. And this, of course, brings me back to dill—by virtue of the fact that it’s the topic I’m actually supposed to be writing about.

As I recall, it was the dill hummus that finally elicited my appreciation for the complex, unusual flavor of this fine herb. I enjoy hummuses (hummi?) with a variety of seasonings, and I noted that despite the piquancy of the cayenne-pepper variety and the potency of the garlic variety—two of my favorites—the dill variety was, in a way, the most distinctively flavored hummus of them all. Dill is, like, its own thing, dude. And the dill hummus was really dill hummus rather than merely hummus with dill. (Dude.)

Since this awakening, I’ve tried to remain attuned to the inimitable herbish charisma of dill—in breads, rolls, soups, sauces, and salad dressings. Around here, Helia’s repertoire includes a little something that I like to call haricots verts au fenouil (lest my degree in French go to waste). Here’s her recipe—I tell you, it’s a dilly!

1 lb fresh green beans, trimmed* (frozen works too)
1 tbsp. butter, olive oil, or a mixture (best!)
1 small clove garlic, minced
1 tbsp. fresh dill, chopped, or 1 tsp. dried dill [aka dill weed —J.)
salt and fresh-ground pepper to taste [see Haven and Craig, respectively —J.]

optional but nice: lemon juice, toasted slivered almonds [Jacuzzi, Moët et Chandon, vacation on the Riviera ... —J.]

* And a manicure, please. —J.

Steam the green beans until just tender. Meanwhile, put the butter/olive oil, garlic, and dill in a pan or heat-proof serving dish and cook on low heat until the butter melts and the garlic becomes slightly translucent. Add the beans and toss. Season with the salt and pepper and optional lemon juice and toss again. Sprinkle almonds on top if desired.

Thanks, Helia! You can oil my almonds anytime. ; )

♪ ♪ ♪

Wikipedia describes dill as a “short-lived perennial herb.” So I guess it’s a good thing I’m writing about it now, before it’s too late. And yet, in the same pickled breath, Wiki notes that “the earliest archeological evidence for its cultivation comes from late Neolithic lake shore settlements in Switzerland.” (Am I the only one picturing Chicago- or Toronto-style condominiums?) So you see, there is an historical link between pickles and yodeling, Virginia!

Charlemagne, we are told by Wiki, “used it [dill] at banquets to relieve hiccups.” If that failed, Madame Charlemagne would jump out of a tureen. Moving from Frankish sexual mores to sexual frankness, it is alleged that dill and fennel like to fuck (though Wiki opts for the term hybridise). Who knew! Apparently, if you plant them near enough to each other, they’re likely to end up in the same bed. Mind you, this (nudge nudge) “hybridisation” gossip has been flagged by Wiki with a “citation needed” tag ... but, come on, you think they’re not sleeping together after all this time? (What the hell do you think they were doing out at the lake in Neolithic Switzerland, dude?)

One final tidbit before I stop pestering Wikipedia: After dill seeds have been harvested, “the seed heads are placed upside down in a paper bag.” Now that sounds like a hiccup cure.

Perhaps I’m justified in thinking that dill, though an herb (and a short-lived one at that!), is more comfortable hanging out in the brazen and sexy world of spices. I say this not only because of its front-and-center flavor, but also because I like how it looks, in its fresh form, as if it would make a nice, soft feather substitute for a bit o’ tickling. (I realize, in actuality, it would probably feel scratchy; still, no harm dreaming feathery dreams of a dilly dalliance.)

But enough dillydallying, for the nonce. Now it’s time for some shilly-shallying. (Curiously, Merriam-Webster asks me to hyphenate the latter, but not the former. I think someone at M-W is pulling my pickle.)

Discussion Topic: What’s your favorite phase of the writing process, if you have one? I think I like writing the beginning of a story the best. Sure, the follow-through leads to richer artistic rewards, and there’s nothing like that sense of accomplishment as a piece comes together in its final stages of revisions ... but I find such magic, such joie-de-vivre (lest my degree go to waste), such a giddy sense of potential in the first few hundred words I get down (which usually, though not without exception, comprise the beginning of the story, in my case). When I’ve completed a piece to my satisfaction, I can hopefully feel that I’ve lived up to the potential ... but at that point I’ve become, with respect to that particular piece, a grizzled, wrinkled, old soul (I’ll thank you to keep your snickers to yourselves) who has labored over every sentence—and that’s different from being the starry-eyed first-draft puppy.

Before I turn the mic over to all of you, let me just say how glad I am to have you here. [Sings] It’s dill-licious, it’s dill-lightful, it’s dill-lovely ... [Nuts, I can’t find an image of a vaudeville performer getting the hook!]

♪ ♪ ♪

The Spicy Summer Sunday blog tour continues!

7/26 Isabel Kerr—ginger

8/2 Marina St. Clare—basil

8/9 BadAssKona—rosemary

8/16 Emerald—poppy seeds

8/23 P.S. Haven—salt

8/30 Gala Goodbye

How the Crab Got Its Knees

Did you ever wonder? Well, I did. That's why I dressed up as Rudyard Kipling one day and wrote my own "Just So" story, to trace the origin of the sexual position known in the Kama Sutra as Karkataka, or The Crab.

Thanks to the great bloggish generosity of renowned erotica writer and editor M. Christian, this peculiar piece of pastiche is now enjoying a revival! The first installment awaits you at M.C's Frequently Felt blog.

Thank you, M.C.!

Friday, July 17, 2009

A Dill-Emma?

Yes, in an attempt to cash in on Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, the Vlasic pickle company is issuing Dill Emma. [jk]

But seriously ... I hope you'll join me here this coming Sunday, July 19, for a not-very-scholarly lecture on the subject of dill—along with a recipe and a writerly discussion! It's my contribution to the Spicy Summer Sunday blog tour.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Now with More Nakedness

I've just updated my website, and it now features author photos by the talented Mayumi Yoshimaru!

And, since it's just not my style to keep all my clothes on for an entire photo shoot, you'll find (if you dare) that I've been up to my old partial-disrobing tricks again. Mind you, it's nothing you don't see at the beach—except perhaps for the black socks. You have been warned.

A technical note: At present, one of the photos is playing hide-and-seek in Internet Explorer, disappearing partially or entirely if one uses certain text sizes only. I shall consult the great Helia about this.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Join the Pepper-azzi!

The Spicy Summer Sundays blog tour continues today at Craig J. Sorensen's. Pass the pepper, please!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Thyme of the Season

The "Spicy Summer Sundays" blog tour continues in a thyme-ly fashion at Scarlett Greyson's!

Friday, July 3, 2009

This could work out perfectly, she thought ...

It's "Fetish Friday" at the great Alison Tyler's place, and today's featured kink is the wet, wonderful world of watersports! If that kind of "water" floats your boat, then get yourself some tea, coffee, or beer and trickle on over for excerpts from Janine Ashbless's "Wet" (as seen in I is for Indecent, ed. Tyler) and my own "Seduction with a Splash" (as seen in AT's K is for Kinky)—along with Alison's illuminating and entertaining discussion of this erotic specialty.

Thanks, AT!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Sex and Satisfaction ... and Savings!

Psst! Grab a towel and sneak over to Erotica Cover Watch for a special discount dealio on Sex and Satisfaction 2!