The Pleasure Dial, and other adventures

Hello!

The big news in Jeremyland is that I have another erotocomedic novel coming out soon! The Pleasure Dial: An Erotocomedic Novel of Old-Time Radio will be published in November by OC Press, a new e-book enterprise that's being launched by the lovely people behind (and in front of) the Oysters & Chocolate Erotic website!

Here's a summary:

The year is 1934, and amiable New York gag writer Artie Plask has taken the West Coast plunge. His first day on staff with a top radio show introduces him to the irresistible Mariel Fenton, a wit among wits who immediately takes an interest in all aspects of Artie’s life—especially his private life. As Artie finds his feet in a world of blustering comedians, pansexual sex goddesses, timid screen legends, exhibitionistic scriptwriters, and self-infatuated geniuses, Mariel leads him on a zany journey up and down the pleasure dial—a giddy romp through Hollywood that’s chock-full of airwaves showdowns, writing-room counterplots, devious impersonations, naked meetings, and a sensuality-drenched assortment of erotic escapades.

Meanwhile, other terrific things have been happening for me. Witty literary maven Matt "Wordpill" Ellis gave Rock My Socks Off a write-up that thrilled and delighted me the way praise from someone who thoroughly gets what one is trying to do always thrills and delights. Harley Moore at the fabulous new 4-Letter Words blog featured an RMSO excerpt and my RMSO theme song. And the Oh Get A Grip! bloggers permitted me to take the floor with my Wodehouse imitation.

Big thanks to all concerned!

Tribute

Over at the Oh Get A Grip! blog this week, they're playing a delightful game: writing imitations of favorite famous authors!

And when OGAG regular Charlotte "Mighty Viper" Stein said she didn't do impressions, it got me thinking... Charlotte Stein is one of my favorite authors, and I wanted to try to write an imitation of her work! And with her kind permission, I did.

What follows is a fake story beginning inspired by the incredible Ms. Stein. It's merely a pale imitation of her genius, of course; but what fun it was to play dress-up!

Then, after reading my pastiche, you'll naturally want to spend some time with the real thing.

Here's to you, glorious Charlotte!

When Winifred invites me out for coffee, I almost don’t go. In fact, I not only almost don’t go, I also almost throw the West Chelmsford Harvest Society commemorative quilt over my head and hide under my bed for three days. The only thing stopping me is the fact that when Winifred asks me out for the coffee, I’m at least two miles north of my bed, and four flights down.

Also, I recall that I finally took the West Chelmsford Harvest Society quilt to a jumble sale last month, because it was the ugliest thing I’d ever seen apart from Ezekiel, my pet toad, whom I miss terribly.

If I still had a pet toad, I could now tell Winifred I have to hurry home to feed it warm moss. Winifred, who is the most witty and sophisticated woman who has ever spoken to me, is probably too sophisticated and witty to know that toads don’t actually eat moss—of any temperature—so she would hopefully believe my cowardly lie and be secretly relieved that she didn’t have to have coffee with me after all, since she probably thinks I’m uglier than Ezekiel the departed toad and has only asked me out in a moment of time-delayed temporary insanity caused by glimpsing a hideous quilt at a jumble sale over the weekend.

Except of course women like Winifred don’t go to jumble sales. Women like Winifred go to bohemian-chic parties with art installations and remix DJs and men approximately ten million times handsomer than me, and maybe I should pretend I do still have a toad and run away now before I melt into a pool of unhandsome patheticness at her bohemian-chic feet.

But somehow I’m too cowardly even to be cowardly, so instead of lying or running away or melting I agree to have coffee with this fabulously arty and remixy woman. And my hard-on.

Oh yes, my hard-on is always here tagging along when Winifred and I are in the same room. You couldn’t pay my hard-on to miss a glimpse of Winifred. So what’s going to happen is we’ll arrive at the cafe, and Winifred will lead me to a table for two, and I’ll have to bring over an extra chair for my hard-on, and then I’ll promptly die from embarrassment—leaving Winifred to step elegantly over my ugly, hard-on’d corpse and move to a table for one, which is where she would have been seated in the first place if she hadn’t succumbed to the insane, quilt-induced impulse of inviting me along.

So, really, things will work out all right for Winifred, one way or another.

Here's What's Going Down

Coming in 2012!
(Edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel!)
No, that isn't the book cover—it's just my story-specific blog-post decoration. : )

Going Down

Pretty Dull Charlotte Stein
Milk Moustache Jacqueline Applebee
Lavender Cynthia Hamilton
Etiquette Sylvia Lowry
Stacked Logan Zachary
Sucking Casey’s Cock Shanna Germain
Getting Something Out of It Annabeth Leong
Bubble Dance Jeremy Edwards
Seriously Jeanette Grey
Shuck It Dusty Horn
Dover to Victoria Station Roxy Rogers
Blush Mary Borsellino
Clean/Dirty Lucy Felthouse
Trimming Tenille Brown
Your Body is a Temple Neil Gavriel
New Additions Rachel Kramer Bussel
Do You Speak French? Chrissie Bentley
Close Your Eyes Viktoria Michaelis
Snowjob A.M. Hartnett
The Perfect Shade Elizabeth Coldwell
The Thousand-and-One Ways Graydancer